Kitten on the Keys on Facebook
Latest new photo by LARRY UTLEY!
Shot at Velocity Ciscus
Tuesday, August 04, 2009
Monday, July 06, 2009
Friday, July 03, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
Ramsey with Anubis
Come see Joshua Ellingson's artwork at
COCOLUXE
Haight Sreet Art Walk
w/ Live performance by Kitten on the Keys!
6/26/09 FREE
5-8PM
Sunday, May 10, 2009
KITTEN ON THE KEYS: “KITTEN” is strictly for adults. This is Kinky Cabaret with a capital “K”. One minute she is a Flapper-ette, then a Tin Pan Alley Toe Tapper who strums the Ukulele. Yep – she’s a busy one all-right.
Kitten is everything. She’s Marlene Dietrich, Betty Boop and Dolly Parton all rolled up in her Bra. In her new show – “Does this Piano make my ASS look Big?” Well, yes and no – it depends on the outfit that she’s wearing. And Kitten has hundreds of them. During the show she is in a Bridal Gown, puts pig snouts on her nipples and even has a pig snout attached to that place “Down There” – you know the one in the G. Spot area.
She dazzles the audience with her audacious antics. Some call her the musical “Snackcake.” Kitten even makes a gentleman from the audience come up on the stage to be humiliated. She sprays some whipped cream on her toes and makes him lick it off. Funny thing is, the guy was a reviewer for a newspaper. (It wasn’t me). He said: “Keep in mind that I’m here to review the show.” He was grinning – so he must have enjoyed the Toe Job.
This hilarious romp-slapping flapper is very frisky. While playing the piano – she entices a virgin-ette to come up on the stage and slap Kitten’s rear while she plays wildly away on the piano. Now if that’s not kinky to you – then you HAVE seen it all.
Kitten (Suzanne Ramsey) will certainly get your libido going to a ragtime beat. No need for Viagra at the show. Kitten is the ultimate Rock Star gone bad. Some of her faves are Alice Cooper and Freddie Mercury. You’ll see other favorites that hang on the back wall.
Upcoming (Ramsey) Kitten will be seen on the National Geographic channel about the History of Bras! And who has burned more than one Bra? Kitten, of course. She would be the perfect choice the N.G. Channel.
Kitten has dazzled and conquered audiences all over Europe, on T.V., and in the States. She is deliriously decadent. Watch those eyebrows. They move around a lot, so do other things on her body. But, of course – this is a family paper, so I can’t give out too many details. Oh, by the way, Kitten has also played Liberace’s mirrored Grand Piano. She’s cute and kinky. Her Original music is hard to resist. Kitten is proud of winning the “Golden Pastie” award at the NY Burlesque Festival for ‘Being the biggest tease’. And when you see the show you will agree.
THIS WEEKEND ONLY AT MAMA CALISTO’S VOICE FACTORY
TICKETS: brownpapertickets.com or 1-800-838-3006
(Near Van Ness on Mission Street)
RATING: FOUR GLASSES OF CHAMPAGNE!!!! (highest rating) –trademarked-
(((Lee Hartgrave has contributed many articles to the San Francisco Chronicle Sunday Datebook Section and produced a long-running Arts Segment on PBS KQED)))
The Photo of Lee Hartgrave Boy Reporter is by Jim Ferreira – Film Noir & Hollywood Glamour. www.lafterhall.com.
YOUR COMMENTS ARE WELCOME HERE: leehartgraveshow@yahoo.com
PRESS STUFF: buzztatler@aol.com
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Thursday, April 09, 2009
My fave day in SF is this weekend!
I am delighted to be ST TICKLE ME IVORIES.....I was sainted by the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence
a year ago at Martunis...and NOW it is 30 years of the best drag queen NUNS on EARTH!
Come celebrate 30 years with the sisters on EASTER Sunday! Dolores Park FREE
Kitten's set just grew to include such fabulous guests acts as the return of the gender bending 1920's duo
THE MUDDFLAPPERS! Miss Rodney Austin the Chick with the Great Big D..k...
Get twitterpated with the MUDDFLAPPERS and do the Bunny Hop with the gorgeous guys of SF BOYLESQUE!
Kitten and pals go on at 12:30 main stage dolores park
Other acts include Polkacide!
"Nun World Order-Easter in the Park" on Sunday, April 12 at
12:00pm.
Event: Nun World Order-Easter in the Park
"30th Anniversary, Easter"
What: Concert
Host: SPI, Inc.
Start Time: Sunday, April 12 at 12:00pm
End Time: Sunday, April 12 at 4:00pm
Where: Dolores Park
I am delighted to be ST TICKLE ME IVORIES.....I was sainted by the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence
a year ago at Martunis...and NOW it is 30 years of the best drag queen NUNS on EARTH!
Come celebrate 30 years with the sisters on EASTER Sunday! Dolores Park FREE
Kitten's set just grew to include such fabulous guests acts as the return of the gender bending 1920's duo
THE MUDDFLAPPERS! Miss Rodney Austin the Chick with the Great Big D..k...
Get twitterpated with the MUDDFLAPPERS and do the Bunny Hop with the gorgeous guys of SF BOYLESQUE!
Kitten and pals go on at 12:30 main stage dolores park
Other acts include Polkacide!
"Nun World Order-Easter in the Park" on Sunday, April 12 at
12:00pm.
Event: Nun World Order-Easter in the Park
"30th Anniversary, Easter"
What: Concert
Host: SPI, Inc.
Start Time: Sunday, April 12 at 12:00pm
End Time: Sunday, April 12 at 4:00pm
Where: Dolores Park
Wednesday, April 01, 2009
Kitten On The Keys Purrs About Upcoming One Kitten Show
By Sister Dana Van Iquity
Published: March 26, 2009
“Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?” starring Kitten on the Keys in a one-woman performance has its world premiere on March 27 and runs for two weekends only at Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory. I had the opportunity to get the words straight from the kitten’s mouth.
(Bay Times) When did you first know you were Kitten on the Keys?
(Kitten) I worked in an antique and vintage clothing store for 17 years and all we listened to was Tin Pan Alley. I became addicted to the naughty double entendre songs of the 1920’s and 1930’s. I likened myself to a punk rock version of a flapper. I had a Victrola and some 78’s. One was “Kitten on the Keys” by Zez Confrey from 1922. This fast-paced ragtime romp reminded me of my dizzy brain where little kittens are frantically padding around on my grey matter. I decided that this was the perfect stage name for me! I have a Victrola with a kitty cat tattooed on my left leg. I never shave the kitty cat and I ask people if they would like to pet my hairy pussy - then I pull down my sock.
You are a master … er … mistress at burlesque. Define that term, “burlesque.” I know it isn’t about just stripping off your clothes. There is a method to the madness, no?
Burlesque is a humorous theatrical entertainment involving parody and sometimes grotesque exaggeration. We live in a time where people need to experience poor man’s theater and some cheeky entertainment. It is not just gals and guys showin’ their “knickers and bits” - there can be variety acts like musicians, magicians, and jugglers too.
Burlesque is a fun form of personal expression for both men and women. I think the WAY you take it off – with a sense of humor and a dash of glamour - is fabulous. I enjoy traveling the country, UK, and Europe performing my twisted songs and silly dances to audiences who are just HUNGRY for this type of entertainment. I am lucky I found super awesome like-minded folks in the late 1990’s in San Francisco – The Cantankerous Lollies and San Francisco’s famous Burlesque Orchestra. They asked me to join in the fun!
When did you discover you had a knack – a drive, as it were – for burlesque?
I have always been drawn to things that were NAUGHTY or wink wink, nudge nudge. I told some off color jokes in third grade. I was first inspired by short reels of Shirley Temple’s Baby Burlesques from the 1930’s. She was put into very adult like situations with a giant diaper. I love that golly geeee whiz energy! Then I saw Queen when I was 11, and Freddie Mercury was bumping and grinding to show tunes out of a glamorous Kimono into these teeny tiny black and white striped shorts. I was in AWE! I adore the sweet hotness of the pre-code films and musicals.
You play soooo many musical instruments – piano, ukulele, accordion, others – when did you take these up, and why?
I was one of those kids FORCED into piano lessons. I was horrible. I have ADD and did not want to play what they wanted me to play. I do not drive a car, and traveling around as a pianist with a giant keyboard on MUNI got to be old, so I was drawn to the old world feeling of the accordion - which is the HARDEST instrument to play! I call my accordion “Ol’ Wheezy.” The ukulele is so 1920’s, the eel’s eyelashes, and voh-dee-oh-doh! My fave is to strum punk rock songs as Betty Boop. I adore the film Some Like It Hot with Marilyn as “Sugar” - her white ukulele was always so cool to me!
You have just returned from Paris. Why for?
I am honored to be involved with this film in Paris. I was there testing songs, costumes, and burlesque acts for a film by Mattieu Almaric (Diving Bell and the Butterfly and Quantum of Solace). Mattieu had seen this show I MC and sing in for French and Italian theater festivals called “Cabaret New Burlesque.” He was so inspired by our frivolity and joy that he wrote a road trip script about an American burlesque troupe traveling throughout the North of France with a washed up producer. I play my musical mistress of ceremonies self in the film. The working film of the title is Tournee.
What about cabaret got you into the biz? You are a fabulous chanteuse.
Jeepers THANKS! I just like music! I was a lonely kid and my only friends were my little AM radio, my records, and stuffed animals! Music has a way of making me happy. It pulls at my many emotions. What I cannot express in words I can express through singing and playing. I was fortunate enough to take lessons from Scrumbley Koldewyn of the Cockettes.
Your CDs are off the wall. Beautifully bawdy. Where do you get your lyrics?
I like writing about fetishes and such. I have so much fun shocking people with these silly sex practices set to music. There are not enough songs about furries and plushies! I just take real life situations and get out the ol’ rhyming dictionary!I watch a lot of old films and musicals for cool songs to cover. I also have a super awesome pal named Bob Grimes, an octogenarian with the world’s largest sheet music collection. He knows my taste, and he saves the super fun and naughty double entendre flapper ditties for me!
Describe yourself without using the words “dirty,” “stacked,” “naughty,” “sexy,” or “velocipede.”
Sassy, silly, musical, squishy, lickable, frothy, spit-curled, rowdy, dizzy, and inappropriate.
Tell my readers why they simply MUST come see your latest show.
I am very proud that a dorky gal from the suburbs like me can transform and have this dual identity and live a happier life through music and art. I have always been very theatrical with silly homemade DIY props and costumes. Almost everything I write is a TRUE story. People always tell me I should write a book! But I cannot spell, so I prefer to sing and play the piano. Audiences can see a well rounded side of me - and a sensitive side to Kitten on the Keys - not just the in your face sexuality.
“Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big” is directed by Dwayne Calizo - the artistic director and founder of Mama Calizo’s - the epicenter of queer and activist art in SF, 1519 Mission St. (Van Ness & 11th Sts.). For info, 1-800/ 838- 3006 or suzanneramsey.net. Warning: This kitten’s got claws!
By Sister Dana Van Iquity
Published: March 26, 2009
“Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?” starring Kitten on the Keys in a one-woman performance has its world premiere on March 27 and runs for two weekends only at Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory. I had the opportunity to get the words straight from the kitten’s mouth.
(Bay Times) When did you first know you were Kitten on the Keys?
(Kitten) I worked in an antique and vintage clothing store for 17 years and all we listened to was Tin Pan Alley. I became addicted to the naughty double entendre songs of the 1920’s and 1930’s. I likened myself to a punk rock version of a flapper. I had a Victrola and some 78’s. One was “Kitten on the Keys” by Zez Confrey from 1922. This fast-paced ragtime romp reminded me of my dizzy brain where little kittens are frantically padding around on my grey matter. I decided that this was the perfect stage name for me! I have a Victrola with a kitty cat tattooed on my left leg. I never shave the kitty cat and I ask people if they would like to pet my hairy pussy - then I pull down my sock.
You are a master … er … mistress at burlesque. Define that term, “burlesque.” I know it isn’t about just stripping off your clothes. There is a method to the madness, no?
Burlesque is a humorous theatrical entertainment involving parody and sometimes grotesque exaggeration. We live in a time where people need to experience poor man’s theater and some cheeky entertainment. It is not just gals and guys showin’ their “knickers and bits” - there can be variety acts like musicians, magicians, and jugglers too.
Burlesque is a fun form of personal expression for both men and women. I think the WAY you take it off – with a sense of humor and a dash of glamour - is fabulous. I enjoy traveling the country, UK, and Europe performing my twisted songs and silly dances to audiences who are just HUNGRY for this type of entertainment. I am lucky I found super awesome like-minded folks in the late 1990’s in San Francisco – The Cantankerous Lollies and San Francisco’s famous Burlesque Orchestra. They asked me to join in the fun!
When did you discover you had a knack – a drive, as it were – for burlesque?
I have always been drawn to things that were NAUGHTY or wink wink, nudge nudge. I told some off color jokes in third grade. I was first inspired by short reels of Shirley Temple’s Baby Burlesques from the 1930’s. She was put into very adult like situations with a giant diaper. I love that golly geeee whiz energy! Then I saw Queen when I was 11, and Freddie Mercury was bumping and grinding to show tunes out of a glamorous Kimono into these teeny tiny black and white striped shorts. I was in AWE! I adore the sweet hotness of the pre-code films and musicals.
You play soooo many musical instruments – piano, ukulele, accordion, others – when did you take these up, and why?
I was one of those kids FORCED into piano lessons. I was horrible. I have ADD and did not want to play what they wanted me to play. I do not drive a car, and traveling around as a pianist with a giant keyboard on MUNI got to be old, so I was drawn to the old world feeling of the accordion - which is the HARDEST instrument to play! I call my accordion “Ol’ Wheezy.” The ukulele is so 1920’s, the eel’s eyelashes, and voh-dee-oh-doh! My fave is to strum punk rock songs as Betty Boop. I adore the film Some Like It Hot with Marilyn as “Sugar” - her white ukulele was always so cool to me!
You have just returned from Paris. Why for?
I am honored to be involved with this film in Paris. I was there testing songs, costumes, and burlesque acts for a film by Mattieu Almaric (Diving Bell and the Butterfly and Quantum of Solace). Mattieu had seen this show I MC and sing in for French and Italian theater festivals called “Cabaret New Burlesque.” He was so inspired by our frivolity and joy that he wrote a road trip script about an American burlesque troupe traveling throughout the North of France with a washed up producer. I play my musical mistress of ceremonies self in the film. The working film of the title is Tournee.
What about cabaret got you into the biz? You are a fabulous chanteuse.
Jeepers THANKS! I just like music! I was a lonely kid and my only friends were my little AM radio, my records, and stuffed animals! Music has a way of making me happy. It pulls at my many emotions. What I cannot express in words I can express through singing and playing. I was fortunate enough to take lessons from Scrumbley Koldewyn of the Cockettes.
Your CDs are off the wall. Beautifully bawdy. Where do you get your lyrics?
I like writing about fetishes and such. I have so much fun shocking people with these silly sex practices set to music. There are not enough songs about furries and plushies! I just take real life situations and get out the ol’ rhyming dictionary!I watch a lot of old films and musicals for cool songs to cover. I also have a super awesome pal named Bob Grimes, an octogenarian with the world’s largest sheet music collection. He knows my taste, and he saves the super fun and naughty double entendre flapper ditties for me!
Describe yourself without using the words “dirty,” “stacked,” “naughty,” “sexy,” or “velocipede.”
Sassy, silly, musical, squishy, lickable, frothy, spit-curled, rowdy, dizzy, and inappropriate.
Tell my readers why they simply MUST come see your latest show.
I am very proud that a dorky gal from the suburbs like me can transform and have this dual identity and live a happier life through music and art. I have always been very theatrical with silly homemade DIY props and costumes. Almost everything I write is a TRUE story. People always tell me I should write a book! But I cannot spell, so I prefer to sing and play the piano. Audiences can see a well rounded side of me - and a sensitive side to Kitten on the Keys - not just the in your face sexuality.
“Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big” is directed by Dwayne Calizo - the artistic director and founder of Mama Calizo’s - the epicenter of queer and activist art in SF, 1519 Mission St. (Van Ness & 11th Sts.). For info, 1-800/ 838- 3006 or suzanneramsey.net. Warning: This kitten’s got claws!
If San Francisco were a woman, she’d be Kitten on the Keys: a coquettish fag hag with twirling tassels, sweeping vistas, and a raunchy rapier wit borne upon tinkling ivories. As such, artist Suzanne Ramsey received the highest honor a local can hope for: She was sainted by the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. Mainstream media tastemakers like E!, HBO, IFC, and Bravo have also succumbed to her charms; recently, cinematic bon vivant Mathieu Almaric (The Diving Bell and the Butterfly and Quantum of Solace) approached her to portray the MC of a burlesque troupe in his new film. So it’s sure to be springtime in Paris for Ramsey, but not before she highlights her hometown roots in Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?, Kitten on the Keys’ first one-ma’am show, which, like most of her work, is autobiographical. Despite corrective shoes and braces, a young girl from Walnut Creek dodges the pitfalls of pig farming, poor body image, and addiction by crossing the Bay Bridge and plunging into a world of fornicating plushies, toe-loving shrimpers, pony people, leather daddies, and overcozy folks on Muni. Somewhere between the interpretive liturgical dance and the song about Ramsey’s geriatric punk boyfriend (“He has hepatitis C/Wakes up lots to pee”), you will assuredly fall in love.
April 4-5, 8 p.m., 2009
Silke Tudor Article SF Weekly
April 4-5, 8 p.m., 2009
Silke Tudor Article SF Weekly
Friday, February 27, 2009
Media Release
PRESS CONTACT: Lawrence Helman PR
415/ 661- 1260 / C. 415/ 336- 8220
lhelman@sbcglobal.net
For Immediate Release: Feb. 24, 2009
To download Hi-Resolution digital images, please visit our press page:
http://www.suzanneramsey.net/doesthispianopress
(All photos by Larry Utley -- Please give photo credit.)
Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory presents…
Kitten on the Keys in
DOES THIS PIANO MAKE MY ASS LOOK BIG ?
A new work (words & music) written by Suzanne Ramsey
(D.I.Y. Resident Artist - aka…Kitten on the Keys)
A World Premiere - Limited Engagement – Two Weekends Only!
March 27 – April 5, 2009 (Fri., Sat. & Sun.)
Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory in SF
http://www.suzanneramsey.net
San Francisco's own Kitten on the Keys (…aka Suzanne Ramsey) is a frisky one ma’am band. Her new one woman musical: DOES THIS PIANO MAKE MY ASS LOOK BIG? follows the hi-jinks of a dorky suburban girl who is insecure, addicted, and socially impaired. Her life changes for the better with the discovery of punk rock and a burlesque rock & roll lifestyle. This world-premiere romp replete with sequins! & sass, told through original songs (written and performed by Kitten) and video, will tickle your funny bones and stir your nether-regions. Kitten on the Keys is a little Judy Tenuta, Mae West, and a dash of Shirley Temple optimism rolled into one perky package. She writes all of her own material and plays the piano, accordion, and ukulele. The show is co-directed by Dwyane Calizo & Suzanne Ramsey. NOTE: This show is for adults over 18 years old only.
DOES THIS PIANO MAKE MY ASS LOOK BIG? has a limited engagement – running two weekends only: March 27, 28, 29 - Fri./Sat., 8:00 pm & Sun. Matinee 2:00 pm,
and April 3, 4, 5 Fri./Sat. 8:00 pm & Sun. Matinee 2:00 pm at Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory - 1519 Mission St. (Van Ness & 11th Sts.), in SF 94103. Tickets are $15 & $20
(no one turned away for lack of funds) -- and available at the door or at Brown Paper Tickets. http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/56774
For more information please call 1-800/ 838- 3006 or visit the web site at: http://www.suzanneramsey.net/doesthispianopress
To View a YouTube clip of Kitten on The Keys visit: http://www.tinyurl.com.au/x.php?1omv
To arrange an interview with performer Kitten On The Keys,
please call publicist Lawrence Helman at 415/ 661-1260
BIO - Kitten on the Keys…aka Suzanne Ramsey is an award-winning musical and burlesque artist. As seen on HBO, E! , IFC, Queer TV, MTV, Bravo, and other media outlets, she embodies the spirit and style of those days of decadence gone by. As a pianist and chanteuse, expect a racy ragtime romp when this little kitty sharpens her claws on a meow mix medley of mad cap gems of yesteryear with a naughty whimsical edge. This Internationally known versatile comedic performer MC's, sings, dances, tickles her ivories, plays the ukulele and accordion in outrageously campy costumes! She's a little Cabaret, Burlesque, and Vaudeville all rolled into in one pink, buxom package! Her coquettish voice channels a saucy Betty Boop coo with a gritty Mae West ommph! Clever, Kinky, and Cute!
Kitten on the Keys is taking off to Paris this Spring ‘09 to portray a version of her burlesque musical mistress of ceremonies self in a film by famed French actor and director Mattieu Almaric
(THE DIVING BELL AND THE BUTTERFLY; QUANTUM OF SOLACE). Mr Almaric has been a fan of the hit show CABARET NEW BURLESQUE that Kitten on the Keys has been performing in for several years throughout France and Italy.
She has opened for seminal punk rockers the DAMNED on the Twisted Cabaret Tour 2007 in the UK, appeared in a video by French rock band FRENCH COWBOY, performed in Midnight Cabarets at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival in Scotland 2008, at the Napoli Teatro Festival in Italy with the show Cabaret New Burlesque, and in Paris Quartier D'ete Festival in Paris 2005. She traveled the US and Canada with Burlesquefest 2003 as the Musical Mistress of Ceremonies! In October 2003 she received rave reviews in Hollywood as the MC for the TeaseOrama Burlesque Convention! In ‘04- ‘06 she was the MC at the Annual Miss Exotic World Contest. Suzanne started performing with The Cantankerous Lollies and SF Famous Burlesque Orchestra several years ago. She plays piano, ukulele and accordion for goth cabaret performer Vinsantos and David J of Bauhaus fame.
In 2003, Suzanne won the SF Weekly Music Award in the New Genre/Beyond Category for her campy vaudevillian performances of her kinky cabaret ditties. Kitten on the Keys was made a SAINT by the thoughtful Sisters Of Perpetual Indulgence- Kitten on the Keys is now SAINT TICKLE ME IVORIES! Her three favorite female role models are Alice Cooper, Liberace, and Freddie Mercury.
Kitten on the Keys has four CD's available on her own label, Rug Burn Records:
Kitten On the Keys (2001); Kitty Muffins (2002); It's Not A Pretty Princess Day (2004);
and Salty Meat Girl (2007).
CALENDAR LISTINGS: Theatre/ Music
WHAT: DOES THIS PIANO MAKE MY ASS LOOK BIG?
Written & Performed by Kitten on the Keys…aka Suzanne Ramsey
A World Premiere – Limited Theatrical Engagement
Two Weekends Only!
WHEN: March 27 – April 5, 2009 (Fri., Sat. & Sun.)
March 27, 28, 29 - Fri./Sat., 8:00 pm & Sun. Matinee 2:00 pm
and April 3, 4, 5 Fri./Sat. 8:00 pm & Sun. Matinee 2:00 pm
WHERE: Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory
1519 Mission St. (Van Ness & 11th Sts.), in SF 94103
TICKETS: $15 & $20 (no one turned away for lack of funds)
available at the door or at Brown Paper Tickets
http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/56774
INFO: 1-800/ 838- 3006
WEB: http://www.suzanneramsey.net
PRESS IMAGES: To download high-resolution digital images:
http://www.suzanneramsey.net/doesthispianopress
To View a YouTube clip of Kitten on The Keys visit:
http://www.tinyurl.com.au/x.php?1omv
###
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Kitten on the Keys One Woman Show Mama Calizo's Voice Factory
Kitten on the Keys One Woman Show Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?
March 27, 28, 29 and April 3, 4, 5----Fridays, Saturdays, 8PM and Sundays Matinees at 2PM
New Works by Spring 2009 D.I.Y Artist in Residence
Kitten on The Keys - In Her First Full Length One Women Show
Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?
Words and Music by Suzanne Ramsey
Directed by Dwayne Calizo and Suzanne Ramsey
Brown Paper Tickets
One of the few remaining native San Franciscan's, Kitten on the Keys is a frisky one ma'am band. Her long awaited one woman musical follows the hi-jinks of a dorky suburban gal who is not so secure, a bit addicted, and oh so slightly socially impaired. All of a sudden, with a flip of a switch, or an hallucination, her life changes by discovering punks, punk-rocker and the rock star lifestyle. This hilarious, rumpus, time-traveling fairytale will tickle your funny bones and stir your nether's like no other. Ms. Kitten's a little Judy Tenuta, a dirty-shot of Mae West, and a dash of Shirley Temple optimism.
On a side note: Her favorite female role models are Alice Cooper, Liberace, and Freddie Mercury. She composes, writes and choreographs all of her material while playing the piano, accordion, and ukulele all at the same time. Come experience this spectacle of Songs! Sequins! Sass! and A#%.
Kitten on the Keys One Woman Show Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?
March 27, 28, 29 and April 3, 4, 5----Fridays, Saturdays, 8PM and Sundays Matinees at 2PM
New Works by Spring 2009 D.I.Y Artist in Residence
Kitten on The Keys - In Her First Full Length One Women Show
Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?
Words and Music by Suzanne Ramsey
Directed by Dwayne Calizo and Suzanne Ramsey
Brown Paper Tickets
One of the few remaining native San Franciscan's, Kitten on the Keys is a frisky one ma'am band. Her long awaited one woman musical follows the hi-jinks of a dorky suburban gal who is not so secure, a bit addicted, and oh so slightly socially impaired. All of a sudden, with a flip of a switch, or an hallucination, her life changes by discovering punks, punk-rocker and the rock star lifestyle. This hilarious, rumpus, time-traveling fairytale will tickle your funny bones and stir your nether's like no other. Ms. Kitten's a little Judy Tenuta, a dirty-shot of Mae West, and a dash of Shirley Temple optimism.
On a side note: Her favorite female role models are Alice Cooper, Liberace, and Freddie Mercury. She composes, writes and choreographs all of her material while playing the piano, accordion, and ukulele all at the same time. Come experience this spectacle of Songs! Sequins! Sass! and A#%.
Saturday, February 07, 2009
"No Strings Attached", Lisa Whitmer's film about burlesque starring the Scenic
Sisters (and featuring interviews with & performances by Kitten on the Keys, Jo
Boobs, Dirty Martini, Satan's Angel, Michelle L'Amour, Baby Doe, and more!), is
playing as part of a collection of short documentaries by Bay Area filmmakers
called "A Homegrown Variety."
There are 2 screenings, both are at the Roxie Cinema - 3117 16th St at Valencia
in the Mission:
Sat. 2/7 at 2:45pm
Sun. 2/8 at 12:30pm
You can get tickets online here:
https://sfindie09.withoutabox.com/festivals/event_item.php?id=22177
We will be moseying over to Laszlo (2526 Mission St. between 21st and 22nd) for
drinks afterwards. They have appetizers from Foreign Cinema if you're hungry.
I ask you: Is there a better way to spend a cold afternoon than watching a
smokin hot film!?!?!
I think not.
Hope to see you there!
Lisa
COME to the Kitten on the Keys One Woman SHow Benefit !
Mama Calizo's Voice Factory starring Satan's Angel!
THANKS for the photo and graphic Larry Utley!
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Kitten on the Keys interview on soundsafe.org
by Paul Zollo
“I have three female role-models: Liberace, Freddie Mercury, and Alice Cooper.” - Kitten On The Keys
“I dwell in the sunset,” she says with a flirtatious giggle. “I’m a beach girl.” She lives just blocks from the beach, and spends a lot of time there, this star of burlesque and all things Kitten. She’s a San Francisco institution (and one of the best) and is her own enduring amalgam of a celebrated Tin Pan Alley/burlesque/vaudeville/punk/glam/diva. A historian, collector, costumer, gifted songwriter, singer, pianist, accordionist and ukulele player, she’s Kitten on the Keys, a native of the Bay area.
“I was born and raised in Walnut Creek,” she admits with a sigh and a dash of embarrassment, and quickly separates herself from a suburban girl. “It’s a beautiful place,” she said, “but not conducive to kooky people like me who had to escape. " From about 13 on, she peppered her suburban existence with periodic trips to Berkley, where she’d hang out with punks and assorted street people (including "some sniffing glue, some pinning rats on their shirts.”) All of which she watched, but from a distance, not participating. Not then, anyway.
Speaking to us on the 2nd day of 2009, she muses about a strange boat that came off its moorings and beached itself near her home. “That was really weird,” she says. “But cool. I loved it. " Her keen appreciation for what is weird, and what’s best in what’s weird, has fueled her journey since its start, when she saw the weird effect her music had upon other people. "My dad would have me stand up at dinner parties to perform,” she said, “which was weird, because that was the only time he would pay attention to me.” Music, for her, was visual from the start, and this was before the days of MTV. At eight she already was fusing music and images in her head, forever glued to her transistor, listening to tunes and dreaming of writing songs and choreographing them too. “It wasn’t just the sound,” she said, “It was the way the whole thing would look, all of it.”
The polarities in her childhood, from G-rated Walnut Creek to the visceral dynamism of Berkeley and beyond, were as starkly contrasted as a David Lynch vision. Playing glockenspiel in the school marching band, she kept her secret punk self concealed, wearing her signature crazy outfits underneath her marching band uniform, and then stashing the uniform behind the bushes after school to hightail it to Berkley.
After high school, she attended San Francisco State, where she delved into the world of underground bands, and worked on her own music. She performed with two bands: first came the White Stains, an all girl band that released a five song EP in 1983 on Round Black Records. Then there was Lethal Gospel, with whom she sang and played piano. They did a gig opening for the Nuns at Wolfgangs and recorded a 1984 single, as well as a cover of the Beatles “Why Don’t We Do It In The Road?”. But she was most excited about her own music, and inspired by psychedelic garage stuff and in love with bands like Cocteau Twins, The Cure, and the Birthday Party, she wrote her own early Kitten music, often accompanying herself on an old synth with a kind of electric harpsichord sound. Asked to define her early style, she laughed and said, “Three chord girly psychedelic songs, with lyrics about going to Elysian Fields, meeting the Gods, and drinking their nectar. But in a stupid, cutesy way.”
Her next major musical project was joining a mostly all-girl punk band called Sugarbabydolls (and later Sugar Babylon) along with Kat Bjelland (who went on to Babes In Toyland), Jennifer Finch (who went on to L7) and Courtney Love (who went on to be Courtney Love.) We discuss this chapter in her life in the following conversation, in addition to all that came after: the glory, the European tours, the movie work, the fame, the wonder that is the everyday existence of Kitten On The Keys, as well as all that is planned for 2009, including a one-woman avant musical called “Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big”
( opening in March at Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory, before moving to the Edinburgh Festival in Scotland), a movie in Paris, a Helsinki burlesque cruise, writing music for Vinsantos (a “glitter Goth cabaret glam macabre snob” which is being produced by David J of Bauhaus, Love & Rockets fame), and more. This is a Kitten who evidently doesn’t nap as much as most.
Today she’s cozy in the oceanside home she shares with her boyfriend Ward Abronski, the lead singer and sax player for the punk rock polka hardcore 2/4 band Polkacide. “He’s my geriatric punk rock prize,” she says with serious glee, before we take off for our journey through Kittenworld.
Photo by:Hiroshi Rebel Shot Media
SOUNDSAFE: You were in the band Sugarbabydoll with Courtney Love. What was she like then?
KITTEN ON THE KEYS: Extremely driven. Delusional. She was a thief, a liar. She was always very interesting, you kind of wanted to be around her cause you didn’t know what was gonna happen next. She was the first person I knew with a Dayrunner. She was siphoning money from whoever she could. She was a stripper. She always said, “I’m gonna become famous,” and we didn’t believe her, and look what happened. I thought she had a lot of talent as a lyricist, but she never wrote any music. All this stuff about her writing music is bullshit.
Me and Kat wrote the music in that band, and Courtney wrote some of the lyrics. She didn’t play an instrument, she sang. Then she went out and hung out with the Faith No More gang. We did more photo-shoots than actual performances.
Why?
Because image was more important to the band than the music.
Did you guys play any gigs?
Yeah. We played at a big party. We didn’t play in any clubs.
Was the music scene in the city good then?
Yeah, it was. At the time Rough Trade records was the most amazing place to go. They had everything. There were great record stores in those days, and it was the best. I’d save all my money to go there and get English import stuff I thought was fun.
What happened to the group?
It completely imploded. There was a fire that burned down a house. Courtney became homeless. Drug problems. Back-stabbing, hatred. Nose-jobs, face-jobs. And then Courtney went on to audition for the Syd & Nancy movie. She was up for the role of Nancy, and she was a Buddhist, and was chanting, to get the job, over some candles, like this Wiccan ritual, and burned down the house they all lived in. She burned down several houses. And so everybody went their separate ways.
What did you do next, after the break-up of the band?
I became so frustrated with the music scene that I actually stopped playing. I went into antiques and costumes. And costumed everybody. I was frustrated doing that, and everyone asked me if I was a performer and I’d say no. One day the AIDS epidemic happened, and lots of my closest friends were dropping like flies. One guy, his specialty was the 1920s, the 1930s and the 1940s. I was playing piano at the Fairmont Hotel, and he said to me, “You play the piano? You know you could make a living doing this”. I was completely oblivious. They told me if I could learn classics, songs by Cole Porter, Irving Berlin, I could work. So I did. I became really obsessed with the 1920s and Tin Pan Alley era. To me, songs were just so fun and silly and actually really naughty and dirty. And I learned about this troupe called the Cockettes: Peter Minton, Scrumbley Koldewyn. Really famous gender-bending gay guys from the late 60s, who had taken this 1920s thing and trotted all over the world with it. They were the great queer drag queen hippies; there is a fabulous documentary about them. Scrumbley did all of the music.
They turned me onto different composers and people who were crazy collectors of music. I met this old man, the great Bob Grimes, and we became super friends. I love him. He has the largest sheet music collection in the world, and cabaret stars from all over the planet come to visit with him. He’s one of the most influential people in my life. I adore him. I have this Shirley Temple music collection, and he and Peter Mintun got me original scores from Hollywood. I play these songs in piano bars and people love them. There is no one else on this earth I can geek out about 78s and Tin Pan Alley and starlets from the past. He is a treasure.
I was asking him for very obscure ’20s stuff, and he had it all. So I started collecting sheet music and would play it. And I wondered who a good audience was for this. A friend of mine worked in a rest home, so I would get all dressed up and go and play in rest homes for these people. And that was their era and they knew all the songs. The smiles on their faces, the recognition, it was really fun. And it just became my thing.
Photo by: Becca Henry
Is this when you took the name Kitten On The Keys?
Yes. I took that name for a number of reasons, which are: A. My mind is kind of frantic and I feel like there’s always a million little kittens running around on my brain on keys making this discordant music. And also B. Because there’s this great song with that name written in 1922 by Zev Confrey, which is a great novelty jazz ragtime song.
So this character was born. And there were these underground parties called Lush and Luster. A magician guy saw me. I was playing a lot of Kurt Weill, Billie Holliday, great jazz torch stuff. And through him I became the piano bitch for every drag queen in town. [Laughs]. And it was great. People started saying, “Why are you playing as a sidekick for people who can’t sing? He’s terrible.” I never saw it, and finally I heard a recording and they were right; he was terrible. And they were like, “Why don’t you sing?” And I’d say, “no, I’m too shy”. Which is funny, cause I’m not shy.
I started going to San Francisco City College, and the teachers were like crazy encouraging. So I was making industrial noise music in the electronic music department and then going down and singing show tunes. I hired ones of the Cockettes, Scrumbley, and he taught me music theory, which I didn’t know. He was awesome and gave me a lot of confidence in my music. And since then I picked up ukulele and accordion. Uke is great; it’s portable and was used so much in the ’20s. But was hard to learn, cause I never had played a stringed instrument.
Before this, I had naively written songs. But after learning all this, I discovered there was a method to all of this, and it made playing in bands much easier. It opened my eyes. I was kind of sad that I didn’t have that naivete anymore. But at the same time, it really helped me grow as a musician.
Then I got involved in a band called the San Francisco’s Famous Burlesque Orchestra, and we backed a dance troupe, which was filled with a great San Francisco collection of odd-balls and weirdos. We had East Bay Ray on guitar, from the Dead Kennedys, people from Frenchie (a kind of go-go lounge band). We started touring, which was really fun. I was pianist and vocalist. And through these tours, I started meeting people all over the country. And the next thing you know people are flying me all over the country to perform cause they thought my stuff was unique.
Were you doing your own songs as well as the old tunes?
Yeah, I was. I love 78s and I have a Victrola. And I love all these great old songs that were just dripping with sexuality. I collected these songs, sheet music and 78s. Really dirty stuff! So that became my thing, and I started writing songs very naively about different sexual subjects which could mean one thing but really meant another. It was kind of a game as to what I could do to make people laugh.
And you started performing overseas. How did that come about?
This woman came to see me and asked me to go perform in France. And from that I started going to Europe a lot to perform. I went on tour with the DAMNED Winter 2007 on the Twisted Cabaret Of The Damned. I was the MC and musical artist for a wee burlesque and cabaret show we did. We went all over the UK, Wales, Ireland; my fave date was in an old music hall in Belfast. An amazing show! So one thing leads to another.
And besides singing and playing music, you also do burlesque. How did that start?
I started emceeing shows. What was great about my job was that I could fill in the spots when the girls were changing clothes. I would tell jokes and sing some dirty ditties, and it became this thing for me. I feel very lucky that the whole Do it yourself punk-burlesque girl thing was happening in the late ’90s when I started doing it. Because I was one of the first people in the Bay Area to be doing it, along with the Cantankerous Lollies, we were the only ones doing this revival.
Photo by: Larry Utley
What’s the burlesque scene like now?
It’s great. All over San Francisco. DNA. Broadway Studios, which was an old punk club in the day. I love The Rite Spot, a great Mission Dive with an out of tune piano. I have been an artist in residence there for several years. And there’s The Makeout Room, the El Rio, Bimbo’s, Great American Music Hall, Slims.
You’ve been around the world, yet you still make your home in San Francisco. Why? Is it still your favorite place in the world?
Absolutely. It’s home-base for me. And I love it here. Last year I went to Europe eight times. I feel that I have a situation where it’s easy for me to live here and travel back and forth. I really love San Francisco, and I feel I do represent San Francisco when I go away. I’m very proud of being from here. San Francisco has nurtured eccentric artists. Not always, though. I am very lucky that during the whole dot com thing, I am still here. I have a great boyfriend who is in the band Polkacide. They’re this old punk rock band; they’ve been doing punk-rock polka for 25 years. [Laughs] We really nurture each other’s careers.
I am very proud to be part of the San Francisco scene. There’s an amazing queer scene here, and I fit into it wonderfully. I feel so lucky to have so many friends. I kind of bounce between a lot of different scenes. Which is great.
I know you performed in the Karla LaVey’s Black Christmas show. What’s that all about?
Karla’s the daughter of Anton LaVey. He was an amazing organ and calliope player, and he used to frequent old burlesque houses. When she contacted me I just had to do her show! I had heard so much about her. She puts on awesome Black Xmas parties with cool underground bands each year. She served us ham and cheese sandwiches and homemade devils food cake. To be with Satanists for Christmas. Great! With the Fuxedos, who were great. And those Satanists were so nice to me. I through in a lot of “Hail Satans” and it was great.
Tell us about your one-woman show.
It’s called “Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?” It premieres in March at Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory on Mission Street. For which I’ve been doing fund-raising and grant-writing.
So far the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence have helped me out. That’s an organization that I volunteer for. They are drag-queen nuns, and they hold the most amazing parties to raise money for women with breast cancer to get wigs. It breaks my heart: they do so much good work. Halloween in the Castro, not so much fun. What’s fun is Easter in the Park with the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. It’s something I have played at for the past six years, and I just love it. To me, that’s the best day in San Francisco all year. People just go all out. It’s crazy. In Dolores Park. They just pack the whole place. It’s full of fun bands and underground singers and cabaret stars and drag stars. They have something for the kids. [Laughs] A hunky Jesus contest. It’s so much fun. And it’s raising awareness and money for a good cause. I love that about San Francisco. We are really kooky and diverse, and I feel like I bring that message wherever I travel.
Photo by: Larry Utley Pepper Studios
Do people in other countries have an accurate idea of what San Francisco is all about?
Sometimes. The first thing they think about is, “Oh, are you queer?” Which is fine with me. The second thing they think about is Haight Street and hippies, which, as you recall, some great music came out of that era. They also think there’s a bit of eccentricity going on. And then they always say, “Omigod, you have so many homeless people there.” [Laughs] A guy in Scotland said to me, “I can’t believe your homeless problem.” I think it’s because we care for people here. We have a lot of services for the homeless.
It’s a better place to be homeless that most places.
It is. It’s very beautiful. And we have a really loving, giving, generous spirit here. When I travel to Europe, and half of the show is West Coast and half is New York, there’s such a difference between the New York people and us.
How so?
I don’t want the New Yorkers to get mad at me! But we’re much more laid-back and kind and polite and forgiving. And I feel like they’re really on edge. And they have to conquer, because it’s such a struggle and a rat-race in New York, it’s a much harder life than it is here. The rents here and in New York are kind of comparable now, because of the dot com thing, but the thing is that there’s more stress there. It’s tough to live there, and your personality has to adapt to that. New York kicks your ass.
Do you think burlesque will continue to thrive?
I do. There’s a lot of bad stuff out there. I don’t think people should just go to Target and get a cute underwear set and get up onstage. I know it’s very infectious, and it looks easy. But it’s not. Everyone loves to be an exhibitionist. It gives them strength and power. They have a word they use (I hate it), I call it the E-word: empower. “Oh, it’s so empowering to take my clothes off.” I hate that. My thing is the F-word: fun! Have a good time. There is a lot of creativity and talent, but it’s not in every club. I prefer to pick and choose shows that are good quality and creativity. I mean, I’m 45 years old and I’m taking off my clothes.
You have an exciting life. Do you work constantly, or do you ever take time off?
I do work constantly. And for the first time in eight years, because the economy is shaky, I had to take a real job. But it’s the greatest job in the world. I get naked for people before 9 in the morning. For children. [Laughter] No, not really. I’m an art model for the Academy of Art. It’s the best job, and it keeps me away from the pastrami sandwiches and fruitcake. My boyfriend does it, too, and it’s the greatest job. I love being in such a creative environment. But it’s great. It’s very meditative. It’s a good way for me to clear my mind. It’s good for me, because I’m constantly on the go. So thank you again, San Francisco, for providing jobs for creative people like me.
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www.kittymusic.com
myspace.com/kittenonthekeys
Photo By:Kingmond Young
©2008 Soundsafe, Inc. ~ All rights reserved.
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by Paul Zollo
“I have three female role-models: Liberace, Freddie Mercury, and Alice Cooper.” - Kitten On The Keys
“I dwell in the sunset,” she says with a flirtatious giggle. “I’m a beach girl.” She lives just blocks from the beach, and spends a lot of time there, this star of burlesque and all things Kitten. She’s a San Francisco institution (and one of the best) and is her own enduring amalgam of a celebrated Tin Pan Alley/burlesque/vaudeville/punk/glam/diva. A historian, collector, costumer, gifted songwriter, singer, pianist, accordionist and ukulele player, she’s Kitten on the Keys, a native of the Bay area.
“I was born and raised in Walnut Creek,” she admits with a sigh and a dash of embarrassment, and quickly separates herself from a suburban girl. “It’s a beautiful place,” she said, “but not conducive to kooky people like me who had to escape. " From about 13 on, she peppered her suburban existence with periodic trips to Berkley, where she’d hang out with punks and assorted street people (including "some sniffing glue, some pinning rats on their shirts.”) All of which she watched, but from a distance, not participating. Not then, anyway.
Speaking to us on the 2nd day of 2009, she muses about a strange boat that came off its moorings and beached itself near her home. “That was really weird,” she says. “But cool. I loved it. " Her keen appreciation for what is weird, and what’s best in what’s weird, has fueled her journey since its start, when she saw the weird effect her music had upon other people. "My dad would have me stand up at dinner parties to perform,” she said, “which was weird, because that was the only time he would pay attention to me.” Music, for her, was visual from the start, and this was before the days of MTV. At eight she already was fusing music and images in her head, forever glued to her transistor, listening to tunes and dreaming of writing songs and choreographing them too. “It wasn’t just the sound,” she said, “It was the way the whole thing would look, all of it.”
The polarities in her childhood, from G-rated Walnut Creek to the visceral dynamism of Berkeley and beyond, were as starkly contrasted as a David Lynch vision. Playing glockenspiel in the school marching band, she kept her secret punk self concealed, wearing her signature crazy outfits underneath her marching band uniform, and then stashing the uniform behind the bushes after school to hightail it to Berkley.
After high school, she attended San Francisco State, where she delved into the world of underground bands, and worked on her own music. She performed with two bands: first came the White Stains, an all girl band that released a five song EP in 1983 on Round Black Records. Then there was Lethal Gospel, with whom she sang and played piano. They did a gig opening for the Nuns at Wolfgangs and recorded a 1984 single, as well as a cover of the Beatles “Why Don’t We Do It In The Road?”. But she was most excited about her own music, and inspired by psychedelic garage stuff and in love with bands like Cocteau Twins, The Cure, and the Birthday Party, she wrote her own early Kitten music, often accompanying herself on an old synth with a kind of electric harpsichord sound. Asked to define her early style, she laughed and said, “Three chord girly psychedelic songs, with lyrics about going to Elysian Fields, meeting the Gods, and drinking their nectar. But in a stupid, cutesy way.”
Her next major musical project was joining a mostly all-girl punk band called Sugarbabydolls (and later Sugar Babylon) along with Kat Bjelland (who went on to Babes In Toyland), Jennifer Finch (who went on to L7) and Courtney Love (who went on to be Courtney Love.) We discuss this chapter in her life in the following conversation, in addition to all that came after: the glory, the European tours, the movie work, the fame, the wonder that is the everyday existence of Kitten On The Keys, as well as all that is planned for 2009, including a one-woman avant musical called “Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big”
( opening in March at Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory, before moving to the Edinburgh Festival in Scotland), a movie in Paris, a Helsinki burlesque cruise, writing music for Vinsantos (a “glitter Goth cabaret glam macabre snob” which is being produced by David J of Bauhaus, Love & Rockets fame), and more. This is a Kitten who evidently doesn’t nap as much as most.
Today she’s cozy in the oceanside home she shares with her boyfriend Ward Abronski, the lead singer and sax player for the punk rock polka hardcore 2/4 band Polkacide. “He’s my geriatric punk rock prize,” she says with serious glee, before we take off for our journey through Kittenworld.
Photo by:Hiroshi Rebel Shot Media
SOUNDSAFE: You were in the band Sugarbabydoll with Courtney Love. What was she like then?
KITTEN ON THE KEYS: Extremely driven. Delusional. She was a thief, a liar. She was always very interesting, you kind of wanted to be around her cause you didn’t know what was gonna happen next. She was the first person I knew with a Dayrunner. She was siphoning money from whoever she could. She was a stripper. She always said, “I’m gonna become famous,” and we didn’t believe her, and look what happened. I thought she had a lot of talent as a lyricist, but she never wrote any music. All this stuff about her writing music is bullshit.
Me and Kat wrote the music in that band, and Courtney wrote some of the lyrics. She didn’t play an instrument, she sang. Then she went out and hung out with the Faith No More gang. We did more photo-shoots than actual performances.
Why?
Because image was more important to the band than the music.
Did you guys play any gigs?
Yeah. We played at a big party. We didn’t play in any clubs.
Was the music scene in the city good then?
Yeah, it was. At the time Rough Trade records was the most amazing place to go. They had everything. There were great record stores in those days, and it was the best. I’d save all my money to go there and get English import stuff I thought was fun.
What happened to the group?
It completely imploded. There was a fire that burned down a house. Courtney became homeless. Drug problems. Back-stabbing, hatred. Nose-jobs, face-jobs. And then Courtney went on to audition for the Syd & Nancy movie. She was up for the role of Nancy, and she was a Buddhist, and was chanting, to get the job, over some candles, like this Wiccan ritual, and burned down the house they all lived in. She burned down several houses. And so everybody went their separate ways.
What did you do next, after the break-up of the band?
I became so frustrated with the music scene that I actually stopped playing. I went into antiques and costumes. And costumed everybody. I was frustrated doing that, and everyone asked me if I was a performer and I’d say no. One day the AIDS epidemic happened, and lots of my closest friends were dropping like flies. One guy, his specialty was the 1920s, the 1930s and the 1940s. I was playing piano at the Fairmont Hotel, and he said to me, “You play the piano? You know you could make a living doing this”. I was completely oblivious. They told me if I could learn classics, songs by Cole Porter, Irving Berlin, I could work. So I did. I became really obsessed with the 1920s and Tin Pan Alley era. To me, songs were just so fun and silly and actually really naughty and dirty. And I learned about this troupe called the Cockettes: Peter Minton, Scrumbley Koldewyn. Really famous gender-bending gay guys from the late 60s, who had taken this 1920s thing and trotted all over the world with it. They were the great queer drag queen hippies; there is a fabulous documentary about them. Scrumbley did all of the music.
They turned me onto different composers and people who were crazy collectors of music. I met this old man, the great Bob Grimes, and we became super friends. I love him. He has the largest sheet music collection in the world, and cabaret stars from all over the planet come to visit with him. He’s one of the most influential people in my life. I adore him. I have this Shirley Temple music collection, and he and Peter Mintun got me original scores from Hollywood. I play these songs in piano bars and people love them. There is no one else on this earth I can geek out about 78s and Tin Pan Alley and starlets from the past. He is a treasure.
I was asking him for very obscure ’20s stuff, and he had it all. So I started collecting sheet music and would play it. And I wondered who a good audience was for this. A friend of mine worked in a rest home, so I would get all dressed up and go and play in rest homes for these people. And that was their era and they knew all the songs. The smiles on their faces, the recognition, it was really fun. And it just became my thing.
Photo by: Becca Henry
Is this when you took the name Kitten On The Keys?
Yes. I took that name for a number of reasons, which are: A. My mind is kind of frantic and I feel like there’s always a million little kittens running around on my brain on keys making this discordant music. And also B. Because there’s this great song with that name written in 1922 by Zev Confrey, which is a great novelty jazz ragtime song.
So this character was born. And there were these underground parties called Lush and Luster. A magician guy saw me. I was playing a lot of Kurt Weill, Billie Holliday, great jazz torch stuff. And through him I became the piano bitch for every drag queen in town. [Laughs]. And it was great. People started saying, “Why are you playing as a sidekick for people who can’t sing? He’s terrible.” I never saw it, and finally I heard a recording and they were right; he was terrible. And they were like, “Why don’t you sing?” And I’d say, “no, I’m too shy”. Which is funny, cause I’m not shy.
I started going to San Francisco City College, and the teachers were like crazy encouraging. So I was making industrial noise music in the electronic music department and then going down and singing show tunes. I hired ones of the Cockettes, Scrumbley, and he taught me music theory, which I didn’t know. He was awesome and gave me a lot of confidence in my music. And since then I picked up ukulele and accordion. Uke is great; it’s portable and was used so much in the ’20s. But was hard to learn, cause I never had played a stringed instrument.
Before this, I had naively written songs. But after learning all this, I discovered there was a method to all of this, and it made playing in bands much easier. It opened my eyes. I was kind of sad that I didn’t have that naivete anymore. But at the same time, it really helped me grow as a musician.
Then I got involved in a band called the San Francisco’s Famous Burlesque Orchestra, and we backed a dance troupe, which was filled with a great San Francisco collection of odd-balls and weirdos. We had East Bay Ray on guitar, from the Dead Kennedys, people from Frenchie (a kind of go-go lounge band). We started touring, which was really fun. I was pianist and vocalist. And through these tours, I started meeting people all over the country. And the next thing you know people are flying me all over the country to perform cause they thought my stuff was unique.
Were you doing your own songs as well as the old tunes?
Yeah, I was. I love 78s and I have a Victrola. And I love all these great old songs that were just dripping with sexuality. I collected these songs, sheet music and 78s. Really dirty stuff! So that became my thing, and I started writing songs very naively about different sexual subjects which could mean one thing but really meant another. It was kind of a game as to what I could do to make people laugh.
And you started performing overseas. How did that come about?
This woman came to see me and asked me to go perform in France. And from that I started going to Europe a lot to perform. I went on tour with the DAMNED Winter 2007 on the Twisted Cabaret Of The Damned. I was the MC and musical artist for a wee burlesque and cabaret show we did. We went all over the UK, Wales, Ireland; my fave date was in an old music hall in Belfast. An amazing show! So one thing leads to another.
And besides singing and playing music, you also do burlesque. How did that start?
I started emceeing shows. What was great about my job was that I could fill in the spots when the girls were changing clothes. I would tell jokes and sing some dirty ditties, and it became this thing for me. I feel very lucky that the whole Do it yourself punk-burlesque girl thing was happening in the late ’90s when I started doing it. Because I was one of the first people in the Bay Area to be doing it, along with the Cantankerous Lollies, we were the only ones doing this revival.
Photo by: Larry Utley
What’s the burlesque scene like now?
It’s great. All over San Francisco. DNA. Broadway Studios, which was an old punk club in the day. I love The Rite Spot, a great Mission Dive with an out of tune piano. I have been an artist in residence there for several years. And there’s The Makeout Room, the El Rio, Bimbo’s, Great American Music Hall, Slims.
You’ve been around the world, yet you still make your home in San Francisco. Why? Is it still your favorite place in the world?
Absolutely. It’s home-base for me. And I love it here. Last year I went to Europe eight times. I feel that I have a situation where it’s easy for me to live here and travel back and forth. I really love San Francisco, and I feel I do represent San Francisco when I go away. I’m very proud of being from here. San Francisco has nurtured eccentric artists. Not always, though. I am very lucky that during the whole dot com thing, I am still here. I have a great boyfriend who is in the band Polkacide. They’re this old punk rock band; they’ve been doing punk-rock polka for 25 years. [Laughs] We really nurture each other’s careers.
I am very proud to be part of the San Francisco scene. There’s an amazing queer scene here, and I fit into it wonderfully. I feel so lucky to have so many friends. I kind of bounce between a lot of different scenes. Which is great.
I know you performed in the Karla LaVey’s Black Christmas show. What’s that all about?
Karla’s the daughter of Anton LaVey. He was an amazing organ and calliope player, and he used to frequent old burlesque houses. When she contacted me I just had to do her show! I had heard so much about her. She puts on awesome Black Xmas parties with cool underground bands each year. She served us ham and cheese sandwiches and homemade devils food cake. To be with Satanists for Christmas. Great! With the Fuxedos, who were great. And those Satanists were so nice to me. I through in a lot of “Hail Satans” and it was great.
Tell us about your one-woman show.
It’s called “Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?” It premieres in March at Mama Calizo’s Voice Factory on Mission Street. For which I’ve been doing fund-raising and grant-writing.
So far the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence have helped me out. That’s an organization that I volunteer for. They are drag-queen nuns, and they hold the most amazing parties to raise money for women with breast cancer to get wigs. It breaks my heart: they do so much good work. Halloween in the Castro, not so much fun. What’s fun is Easter in the Park with the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. It’s something I have played at for the past six years, and I just love it. To me, that’s the best day in San Francisco all year. People just go all out. It’s crazy. In Dolores Park. They just pack the whole place. It’s full of fun bands and underground singers and cabaret stars and drag stars. They have something for the kids. [Laughs] A hunky Jesus contest. It’s so much fun. And it’s raising awareness and money for a good cause. I love that about San Francisco. We are really kooky and diverse, and I feel like I bring that message wherever I travel.
Photo by: Larry Utley Pepper Studios
Do people in other countries have an accurate idea of what San Francisco is all about?
Sometimes. The first thing they think about is, “Oh, are you queer?” Which is fine with me. The second thing they think about is Haight Street and hippies, which, as you recall, some great music came out of that era. They also think there’s a bit of eccentricity going on. And then they always say, “Omigod, you have so many homeless people there.” [Laughs] A guy in Scotland said to me, “I can’t believe your homeless problem.” I think it’s because we care for people here. We have a lot of services for the homeless.
It’s a better place to be homeless that most places.
It is. It’s very beautiful. And we have a really loving, giving, generous spirit here. When I travel to Europe, and half of the show is West Coast and half is New York, there’s such a difference between the New York people and us.
How so?
I don’t want the New Yorkers to get mad at me! But we’re much more laid-back and kind and polite and forgiving. And I feel like they’re really on edge. And they have to conquer, because it’s such a struggle and a rat-race in New York, it’s a much harder life than it is here. The rents here and in New York are kind of comparable now, because of the dot com thing, but the thing is that there’s more stress there. It’s tough to live there, and your personality has to adapt to that. New York kicks your ass.
Do you think burlesque will continue to thrive?
I do. There’s a lot of bad stuff out there. I don’t think people should just go to Target and get a cute underwear set and get up onstage. I know it’s very infectious, and it looks easy. But it’s not. Everyone loves to be an exhibitionist. It gives them strength and power. They have a word they use (I hate it), I call it the E-word: empower. “Oh, it’s so empowering to take my clothes off.” I hate that. My thing is the F-word: fun! Have a good time. There is a lot of creativity and talent, but it’s not in every club. I prefer to pick and choose shows that are good quality and creativity. I mean, I’m 45 years old and I’m taking off my clothes.
You have an exciting life. Do you work constantly, or do you ever take time off?
I do work constantly. And for the first time in eight years, because the economy is shaky, I had to take a real job. But it’s the greatest job in the world. I get naked for people before 9 in the morning. For children. [Laughter] No, not really. I’m an art model for the Academy of Art. It’s the best job, and it keeps me away from the pastrami sandwiches and fruitcake. My boyfriend does it, too, and it’s the greatest job. I love being in such a creative environment. But it’s great. It’s very meditative. It’s a good way for me to clear my mind. It’s good for me, because I’m constantly on the go. So thank you again, San Francisco, for providing jobs for creative people like me.
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Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Looking for something different to do on Chistmas?
Anton LaVey- organist and famous Satanist's daughter Karla LaVey carries on a SF tradition:
BLACK X MASS 2008 - A San Francisco Tradition on Christmas
Karla LaVey's First Satanic Church presents the 11th Annual BLACK X MASS with the EXTRA ACTION MARCHING BAND, THE FUXEDOS, FLUFF GRRL, SASSY!!!, KITTEN ON THE KEYS (burlesque), Theremin Wizard Barney, Michael Peppe (Church of the SubGenius), The Devil Dancers, The Cloven Hoofers and special guest jam.
Where: THE ELBO ROOM - 647 Valencia @17th St. San Francisco, CA 94101
Date: Thursday, December 25, 2008
Time: 9:00 P.M. till closing (approx. 1:45 A.M.)
Admission: $10 (sliding scale)
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